Let me begin by saying, yes, I am late in blogging about this. But I think after 18 months of infertility it is still a little difficult for me to believe that I am actually pregnant. I also felt like this post was super important and shouldn't be jumped in to until I had the proper time and energy to do it justice. However, if I waited until I could find the words to describe the last week of my life I would never get there. It's been a crazy ride.
Mother's Day was 4 days after our transfer. I knew it was too early to test, and I restrained myself. Monday after work I started spotting, not much, but enough to freak me out and be convinced that Aunt Flo was headed to town. After the spotting incident I asked Pierce to give me my PIO shot, so I could go to sleep and not think about it anymore. The next morning I tested, and it was negative. I cried for several hours. I begged God to not let this happen and questioned where we would get the money to go it again. I was a mess.
We went out to lunch, and I went in to work for a meeting later in the day. Meanwhile, the day before's spotting had not progressed. I began to feel a bit of optimism creeping back in. I decided I wouldn't test on Wednesday but would on Thursday. If the blood was implantation, I wanted to give the little one enough time to burrow in and start producing lots of HCG. Thursday morning, STILL NEGATIVE. But it's worse than negative because there is this crazy evaporation line that COULD be a second line if you look at it sideways while standing on the vanity with the stick up against the light. Seriously! I left for work and asked Pierce to please go get some other kind of test 'cause the Dollar Tree was about to push me over the edge.
I held my pee for 4 hours on Thursday night so that I could take the Clear Blue Easy tests, one plus/minus, one digital. Unbelievably, they both came up positive immediately!
I laughed and cried and screamed. I have never seen this before. I felt like someone was playing a trick on me. I didn't sleep at all that night.
Friday morning was our beta draw. Pierce got the phone call around 3:00. Beta was 196! The average beta at 14dpo is 100. He called me at work to give me the news. All of sudden it was real: We are pregnant!!!! Our second beta was drawn today and came back at 784. That's quadruple Friday's number, and all it needed to be was double. They are very happy with these numbers, so there won't be a third beta. In fact I won't be going to the RE's office again until June 10 for our scheduled sonogram. I will be seven weeks along at that point, and we will be able to see the heartbeat(s). We did transfer two beautiful blasts, so now we have to wonder just how many little heartbeats there will be. If you have a hunch or an educated guess based on these random beta numbers, please take my poll to the left. I think I may go batty between now and June 10. I can't honestly remember the last time I didn't go to the doctor for three weeks. I will probably keep peeing on sticks to reassure myself.
Thank you, Lord, for this beautiful miracle!